MOMS TALK: How Do You Prepare An Anxious Child For The First Day Of School?

My first day as a first grader at Lowell Elementary School was awful.

Actually, it was a disaster.

I did fine as half-day afternoon kindergartener the previous year. I liked everything about kindergarten. But first grade? Forget about it.

Being a first-grader terrified me. I didn't want to be there all day, didn't like the idea of a new class, was afraid of the lunchroom, and was mad that my younger brother got to stay home and play all day. I remember trying hard not to cry when Mom dropped me off in my new class. My stomach just churned and twisted in knots. As soon as my mom left the doorway, something happened.

It was pretty bad.

When the teacher was distracted with another student, I quietly slipped out of the classroom door and made a run for it. I could see my mom's car starting to pull away from the curb and I broke into a frenzied sprint. Worst part? The way the school was set up, I had to run into an alley way with oncoming traffic.

Mom didn't see me coming and had to stop again due to traffic. I caught up to the car. I grabbed onto the door handle and then Mom started to pull away, in effect, dragging me.

Let's just say I held on tight and dug my heels into the cement as hard as I could and I screamed. In fact, part of the heel of one my new school shoes came off.

I'll tell you, I admire my mother. She actually handled me with a lot of compassion after that car got stopped and wasn't mad about the shoe. Of course, she marched me right back to the classroom too. 

That solved that. My fugitive days ended right then and there. And you know what? I did okay after all, and a few days later, school was cool.

So, how about your kids?

For some, there's a great deal of anxiety about starting the school year (especially for those attending a new school). Worrying about friends, adjusting to a new teacher's style, trying to work out a new schedule and new expectations, homework changes, routine disruptions....

Makes me get butterflies in my stomach just writing it.

We adults can relate, yes? Think of how you felt when you started a new job or changed your job. Having to introduce yourself and converse at a social event. Perhaps it's having to get up and give an impromptu speech. Things like this can be nerve-wracking to say the very least. Not unlike the anxiety back to school time brings for the kiddos.

So, how do you ease your child's concerns about starting school?

The experts at MyOptumHealth.com (via the abc.12 website) offer these tips to ease back to school jitters:

• If your child is new to a school district, call the school and ask if there is a new student orientation. There he can meet other kids who are in the same boat, so there will be a few familiar faces on the first day.
• If there is no orientation, ask for a tour of the school. See if you can meet your child's teacher.
• Find out which of your child's friends will be in his classroom. Have them play together before school starts. Having a friend nearby can help your child relax.
• A few weeks before school begins, start easing your child into her school routine. Have her go to bed a little earlier each night until she's falling asleep at the proper time. Also have her wake up earlier in the morning.
• Go back-to-school shopping. Make it a special day. Go to lunch and then let him choose his school supplies and new clothes. Allow him to express himself in a way that will make him feel comfortable and confident on his first day.
• If your child worries about how to approach her peers or teachers, do some role-playing. Give her the tools she'll need to forge new relationships.
• Reassure him that even though the first day or two may take some adjustment, he'll soon fall into his new routine.

Some of these tips could be translated to older kids too, actually.

So, what do you do to ease your child's concerns about back to school? 

All are welcome to add to the discussion below in comments.